Third Time’s the Charm…But Not the Espresso

30 Jun

For Christmas this year, we gave my dad one of those Starbucks Verismo machines that make lattes and cappuccinos and all that classy stuff that makes me feel like a princess. It’s a nifty little thing, and we’ve become addicted. We drink coffee like it’s water these days…which is probably not that healthy. But you know what they say: a family that caffeinates together, stays together.

Given our familial caffeine addiction, you can imagine we go through a TON of the little Starbucks coffee pods each week. Being the loving, caring, helpful daughter that I am (aka the college student whose biggest activity of the day is taking a shower… or not…) my mom usually asks me to pick up the Starbucks pods. “Okay, sure!” I say, usually happy to have something to do.

The first time I embarked on this mission was two weeks ago. I walked into the store, found the pods, and brought them home. Mission accomplished, I thought. I rock!

As it turns out, I had conveniently decided to purchase decaf pods instead of caffeinated ones. And when I say “decided,” I mean I walked into the store, ordered a drink for myself, had a minute to think while my order was being made, remembered I was supposed to be buying coffee pods, and randomly selected two boxes of what looked to be coffee off of the display shelf. Hence the grievous decaf.

Thanks to me, my mom had to go back the next day to exchange the decaf pods for the regular ones. Well done, Soph. Well done.

Then, last week, my mom again entrusted me with the all-consuming task of pod-purchasing. “Don’t forget to get the CAFFEINATED ones,” she cleverly reminded me.

“What kind of a dummy do you think I am, Mom?” I responded. I obviously wouldn’t make the same mistake twice in a two-week period! I’m in college, for goodness sake!

Wrong. Wrong again. This time, I went to CVS on my way to Starbucks. CVS was having a sale on gum, so I got really excited and bought three packs, a toothbrush, and a magazine. Then, I stopped in at Bedford Farms before heading home. Wow, I thought, what a productive afternoon! I’m exhausted!

When my mom asked me where I’d put the pods that I’d “purchased yesterday,” I tried to offer her some gum as a peace offering. She did not accept. Not only had I left her in a horrid state of caffeine withdrawal, but I’d also managed to purchase her LEAST favorite flavor of gum. Another victory on my part.

This week, my mom AGAIN asked me to do a “pod-run” (which is a phrase I like because it’s one letter removed from a “pond run,” which makes me sound athletic and outdoorsy). I was kind of in disbelief when she asked me a third time, given my failed track record. But, having already caught up on all of my television shows for the week, I decided I would take on the challenge a third time.

I gave myself a pep talk on the ride over. I CAN DO THIS, I thought. No. I WILL DO THIS. I pulled my shoulders back, lifted my chin, and walked triumphantly into Starbucks. I successfully found the area of the store where the pods are supposed to be located. I saw my enemies, the decaf pods, and smirked at them – you little suckers won’t get me again with your decaffeinated nonsense!

Feeling a renewed sense of confidence, I found the boxes labeled “Verismo Coffee Pods” and brought them to the register, where the barista informed me they were having a special sale, and that the pods were buy two, get the third free. Yes, this is awesome! Mom’s going to be SO proud of me. Maybe I’ll get a cookie in my lunchbox! I was really excited about this entire experience.

 (For the record, I wasn’t one of those kids for whom a cookie was a “special treat”… which probably explains a lot about my youth.)

I raced home with THREE, count ‘em, THREE pod boxes in tow and put them by the Verismo machine.

Today, my mom texted me claiming that what I had purchased was not espresso, but regular coffee. To which I responded (in blue):


In all of my excitement and determination, I’d managed to get the plain coffee instead of the espresso. Apparently, there is in fact a difference.

Whatever. I’m going to Dunkin Donuts.


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